


Planet Plasmius

by Hound and Hare (tittysatan)



Series: Vladdy Kink [16]
Category: Danny Phantom
Genre: I fucking hate phantom planet, M/M, S3 E12-13 Phantom Planet, ch. 2 is the Vladdy Kink afterword, continuity with Gravitational Two-Body Problem, for a grand finale this is pretty underwhelming but it was gonna be this or nothing, kinda uncomfortable vlad, slutty danny
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-11
Updated: 2019-06-11
Packaged: 2020-04-24 08:04:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,621
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19169158
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tittysatan/pseuds/Hound%20and%20Hare
Summary: Vlad won. Vlad won a MONTH ago. So why hasn't he claimed his prize yet?





	1. Planet Plasmius

“...CEO of VladCo and mayor of Amity Park, Missouri, has announced that he is half-ghost. He offered to save Earth from the meteor by using his spectral powers to make it incorporeal, causing it to pass harmlessly through, in exchange for making him President of the Earth and a truly obscene sum of money. Whether this deal with the devil will be accepted…”

 

“...failed to follow through, as the meteor is made of a material he can’t touch, displaying an impressive lack of foresight and research. Masters is currently missing in action, or presumably, hiding in shame following his attempt at establishing a dictatorship and subsequent public humiliation. This means the fate of the world is…”

 

“...returned with a bold and daring plan: instead of the meteor, he and his ghostly allies will make the _entire world_ incorporeal. For the first time ever, ghosts are collaborating with humans under the leadership of Masters. Truly a brilliant scheme--and I’m not just saying that because it’s illegal to speak ill of our new World President. Construction on the necessary equipment is proceeding smoothly, and…”

 

It had been a month since Vlad won. A month since he saved the world, a month since he showed up at the Fenton household asking Maddie to be his queen, a month since Danny offered himself up instead since this whole stupid thing was his fault in the first place and he had to do _something_ to make up for it. A month since Vlad made him his personal assistant and dressed him up in a stupid preppy uniform with a sweater vest and sock garters and tiny, slutty shorts. Danny had been living with Vlad for a month now, a full calendar month, and Vlad still hadn’t fucked him.

And that was weird, right? Like, wasn’t that what this was all about in the first place? Vlad’s whole weird obsession with him, trying to clone him, wanting him to be his “son”... Danny _knew_ the perv was into him, he had _proof,_  and he’d been sleeping in the room right across the hall from him for a month now and _nothing_. And yeah, Vlad was making Danny _assist_ him... _personally_...but it turned out that just meant really boring filing.

And the thing was, he’d been bracing himself for this ever since Vlad declared he’d get rid of the meteor (maybe even since he figured out Vlad was into him), which wound up meaning that he spent a lot of time imagining what sort of gross humiliating things Vlad was gonna make him do. Not that he _wanted_ to, it just sorta…happened. And as it turned out, Danny _was_ a teen boy with teen boy hormones, and Vlad _did_ make him feel some things once you got past him being his nemesis, and, well… As it turned out, imagining Vlad bending him over his desk or forcing him to his knees in front of him? Kinda turned him on. He wasn’t happy about it, boy oh boy was he not happy about it, but that was just how it was. So yeah, over the last month Danny had gone from nervous to confused to impatient to honestly kinda offended.

“Daniel, be a dear and get those papers from the fax machine.”

Danny put aside his DS, heaved himself up from the couch in the corner of Vlad’s office, got the papers, and tossed them on Vlad’s desk before slumping back down onto the couch.

“Oh, it’s just more humanitarian nonsense… Empty the out tray, it’s getting full,” Vlad said like he’d been waiting for Danny to get comfy again. Which he probably had been, knowing him.

Danny snapped his DS shut as loud as possible, walking over and sitting down on the edge of Vlad’s desk, picking up the papers and flipping through them.

“...you’re in the way, boy.”

“Sure am.”

Now it was Vlad’s turn to sigh, burying his face in his hands. “You are _useless_ as an assistant, you know that?”

“Makes me wonder why you keep me around,” Danny said, shooting him a glance. He _thought_ he knew, but if Vlad wasn’t gonna fuck him, he really was pretty useless. Mostly because he didn't try, at all.

“I wonder that myself,” Vlad said, shoving Danny off his desk. “All I’m asking you to do is empty the out tray; it’s not exactly rocket science.”

“Yeah, if it was rocket science I’d probably care,” Danny said, leaning up against the desk and looking at the faxed papers. Social services, aid for developing nations, medical research...  “You ever think about actually approving some of these?”

“No.”

“Why not? I’ve seen the budget, it’s literally nothing. You spent more on putting those stupid statues everywhere.” Danny had no idea why anyone would want statues of himself in every major city in the world, but Vlad _was_ a massive egotist.

“You understand the numbers!” Vlad said, golf-clapping. “Amazing. I’m so proud.”

“Shut it. I’m serious though, why do you even care? You have more money than you could ever use in a million years, why not throw some of it towards something that’d actually be _good_ for a change?”

Vlad finally looked up from his computer to glare at Danny. “Because I’m not one of the good guys, Daniel,” he said like it was the most obvious thing in the world and Danny was an idiot for even asking. “I don’t know if you’ve forgotten, but I am, in fact, evil.”

“Okay, I’ve been meaning to say this for ages now, but seriously? What are you, a Saturday morning cartoon villain?”

Vlad blinked, frowning. “I beg your pardon?”

“You’re not _evil_ , that’s not how it works in real life,” Danny said, crossing his arms. “You’re a lonely narcissistic weirdo. Don’t try to make it sound cool just cause you have superpowers and took over the world or whatever.”

Vlad looked like he’d been slapped. “Ex _cuse_ me!?”

“I mean, you’re not even a very good dictator! Like don’t get me wrong, I’m not exactly complaining that you’re not putting people in camps or whatever, but you’re not doing _anything!_  It’s been a month and you have done literally nothing. Nothing has changed.”

“T-these things take time!”

“Do they really? Cause last I checked, you didn’t exactly need public approval to get stuff done. It’s like you took over the world just to prove you could and didn’t think any further ahead than that.”

Vlad fell quiet, face red and mouth working in annoyance.

“Got it in one, huh?” Danny smirked.

“Quiet.”

Danny walked around Vlad’s desk and sat on the edge, next to his computer. “Okay, think about it this way,” he said. “You know what usually happens to dictators?”

“No one’s going to _assassinate_ me,” Vlad said. “As you yourself pointed out, I have superpowers.”

“Yeah, but it’s not like you’re immortal or anything.” As far as he knew. Vlad _was_ already half-dead. Probably not though. “Right now? No one wants you in charge. Literally not a single person. They’ll figure something out eventually.”

“Oh, and I suppose the teenager has a solution?” Vlad said with a sneer.

Danny waved the papers in his face. “You ever considered being a good guy?”

“Not that I expect you to have the slightest knowledge of history, but ‘good guys’ wind up assassinated quite often as well, you know.”

“Yeah, but at least they’re remembered better. You wanna go down as some headcase halfa who inconvenienced everyone for a few years before someone offed him?”

“I saved the world, if you’ll recall!”

“Yeah, and _everyone still hates you_.”

Vlad glared up at Danny for a moment before turning his back to him. “And what do you care anyways? I would have thought you’d be glad to see the last of me.”

“...yeah, so would I,” Danny said. But living with Vlad had been… Informative. Now that he wasn’t actively trying to kill Danny or make him his son or whatever, he was actually...kinda decent? In a pathetic sort of way. That was the main takeaway here: that Vlad wasn’t evil as much as he was pretty dang pathetic. But if he was already in charge, and he could do whatever he wanted, why not use it to actually make things better? Danny might not be able to hunt ghosts anymore (not that ghosts really needed hunting, since Vlad negotiated a treaty or whatever), but he hadn’t stopped wanting to be a hero.

...and maybe he did kinda like living in the lap of luxury, too. Even if it was Vlad’s lap.

“C’mon, Vladdy, please?” Danny said, swiveling Vlad’s chair back around to face him. “For me?”

“...why on earth do you think I would do _anything_ for you.”

“Dunno, for the same reason you keep me around even though we both know I’m a really lousy secretary?” Danny said with a shrug. “The same reason I’ve got unlimited allowance? The same reason you put me in this dumb uniform with the tiny, slutty shorts?”

Vlad blinked. “...what?”

“I dunno, okay? I _wish_ I knew why you did any of this.” And then, before Danny could stop himself, “I just thought you’d say something like ‘if you want something from me, little badger, you’d better earn it.’”

There was a very, very long moment of silence. Danny got redder and redder as the reality of what he’d just said sunk in. Vlad’s frown was getting deeper and more confused by the second. “...sorry?” he finally said. “Are you… You’re not saying you think I… Why, in God’s name _why_ do you think I want... _that!?_ ”

“Are you saying you don’t!?”

“Of course I am!”

“Are you seriously gonna look me in the eyes and tell me you’ve never thought about having me get under that desk and suck you off.”

“I have _not!_ ”

Danny groaned with exasperation. “Oh come on, I _know_ you fuck me! I met future us and for some reason we’re, like, married or something, alright!?”

Vlad fell back in his seat, wide eyed.

“...you know the Observers, right?” Danny said. “Clockwork?”

“Yes, the incident with Vortex…”

“Yeah, well, I don’t wanna get into the whole thing, but stuff happened and I wound up stuck ten years in the future,” Danny said, resting his head in his hand. “I went to find you cause I didn’t have any other leads, and…y’know, like I said. My whole family and all my friends died in that timeline and somehow, I wound up living with you, and we wound up as a couple. It was weird as heck and I tried not to think about it. So yeah.”

Vlad was still just staring.

“Oh, and before you say maybe it was when I got older, it was like... _right_ after I moved in with you, apparently. I asked.”

“So…” Vlad was turning red, one hand over his mouth. “You’re saying I… We…”

“You _know_ I couldn’t make this up.”

“So this entire time, you thought I…”

“Why else would you want me here!?” Danny asked. “I’m a really crappy assistant!”

“Yes, you certainly are,” Vlad muttered. “And it was a power play; having my defeated foe at my beck and call.”

“Yeah, well, making me suck your dick would be one heck of a power play too.”

Vlad looked up at Danny, frowning thoughtfully. “...you know, if I didn’t know better, I’d think you _wanted_ to fellate me.” A pause. “‘Fellate’ means to suck a dick, to borrow your parlance.”

“I, I knew that! ...and I never said I wanted to,” Danny said, looking away.

“Yes, but you _do_ keep bringing it up,” Vlad said, cocking an eyebrow. “The thought had never so much as crossed my mind until now.”

“Yeah, I can’t buy that you’d put me in these shorts unless you wanted my ass.”

Vlad made a strangled noise and turned even redder. “I want no such thing…!”

“Okay, I could _maybe_ believe that you were in denial about it,” Danny said, jumping down from the desk and leaning in close to Vlad, “but if I offered to suck you off, would you seriously say no?”

“...are you offering?”

“ _If_ I offered.”

“I’m not going to deal in hypotheticals, Daniel,” Vlad said, rolling his eyes. “If you’re not offering, it hardly matters, now does it.”

“No, I actually think it kinda does matter if… Oh, forget it!” This was stupid. This whole conversation was stupid, and Vlad _definitely_ wanted to fuck him even if he wouldn’t admit it, and Danny was going to prove it. Blushing like crazy, he knelt down in front of Vlad, resting his head on the man’s knees and looking up at him through his lashes. “Yes. I’m offering. Alright?”

Vlad was staring down at him, red-faced and wide-eyed, fingers gripping the armrests, legs tight together. He was getting a hard-on. “W-well,” he finally said. “I suppose, if you’re offering…”

“I knew it!” Danny said, pumping a fist. “I _knew_ you wanted to do me!”

“You… Did you set me up!?” Vlad snapped, looking about ready to strangle him. “Why, you little…!”

“Jeez, Vladdy, did you want it that bad?” Danny laughed. “You’re so desperate it’s honestly kinda cute.”

“You are an insufferable, ruinous brat, and I hate you,” Vlad muttered, arms crossed.

“Aw, don’t worry, I’ll still suck you off,” Danny said, spreading Vlad’s legs. “You’re welcome.”

“Quiet.”

“See, what I don’t hear you saying is ‘don’t suck my dick,’” Danny said, undoing Vlad’s fly. The man gave a soft uncomfortable noise, and there was a bulge in his underwear, and all of a sudden it hit Danny that he was really doing this. He was in front of Vlad, between his legs, about to pull his dick out and put it in his mouth, and as many times as he’d thought about it, and as hard as Danny was, none of that meant he was actually ready.

“...are you losing your nerve?” Vlad asked, petting his hair.

“N-no!” Danny said, slapping Vlad’s hand away and pulling him out.

That...sure was a dick. Definitely the first time he’d been this up close and personal with someone else’s. It didn’t exactly look like the sort of thing Danny wanted to put in his mouth; at least, not before it was washed. Slowly, he wrapped a hand around it and began to stroke like he’d jerk himself off, and yeah, the way Vlad moaned at that was really dang hot, but… No, he said he’d do this and he wasn’t gonna back out now, not even if it was weird and gross. He’d signed up for this; he had to finish what he started.

Slowly, Danny leaned forward, closing his eyes, and gave it a lick.

No. No, he couldn’t do this, he didn’t wanna chicken out after that whole conversation but he _couldn’t,_  he physically could not make himself do that again. He’d thought he was ready but he wasn’t. He couldn’t do this.

“...Daniel?” Vlad said after a moment had passed without Danny moving. Then he put a hand on his shoulder and gently pushed him back. “You don’t have to, you know.”

“...sorry.”

“We’ll just pretend it never happened, alright?”

Danny hesitated a moment, staring at the floor. There’s no way they could actually do that. It’d always be hanging between them. You can’t almost suck someone’s dick and then just pretend it never happened. And besides, Danny was still hard, and Vlad was also still hard, and it had really only been the whole ‘dick in his mouth’ thing that had bothered him, so...

“...I mean...we don’t _have_ to,” Danny said, looking up at Vlad, layering a hand over the one on his shoulder.

Vlad blinked, blushed, looked away. “Well, if you’re sure… You know if you change your mind we can stop any time, of course, I don’t wish to pressure you, but if you’re absolutely certain…”

“Jeez, you are such a _dork_ ,” Danny said with a laugh. “It’s cute.”

“...allow me a little nervousness; this _is_ illegal, you know.”

“Uh, did you forget that you’re the law now?”

“If you haven’t noticed, I’m rather preoccupied,” Vlad said, pulling Danny up and onto his lap. “With humoring a certain bratty someone, I might add.”

“Whaddaya know, same here,” Danny said, lacing his fingers behind Vlad’s neck and letting the man shift his legs so he was straddling him, Vlad’s bare erection up against Danny’s clothed one.

“...may I?” Vlad said, caressing Danny’s face, leaning in until they were forehead to forehead.

Danny nodded, and let Vlad kiss him.

This was wrong, probably. This should probably feel wrong. He was a minor and Vlad was old enough to be his dad and also used to be his nemesis, so this was all probably not great.

That didn’t stop Danny from liking it, though. Vlad was a terrible kisser (probably cause he’d never done it before) but he was getting _so into it_ (probably also cause he’d never done it before), moaning into Danny’s mouth and running his hands all over him and trying to fumble open his pants without breaking the kiss, and it was honestly kinda intoxicating to have someone, _Vlad_ , going this crazy over him. So Danny just kissed him back, pulling his own dick out and wrapping a hand around both of them, letting out a moan when he felt Vlad’s hand layer over his.

“...you _are_ sure about this?” Vlad asked.

“Just shut up and touch me.”

Vlad did, gripping them tight together and stroking slowly until Danny was clinging to his suit, face buried in the crook of his neck, moaning and sighing and squirming with pleasure. It wasn’t just that he was being touched (though it did definitely feel good), it was everything else; Vlad’s hips bucking reflexively, the soft noises he made, the heat of his cock against Danny’s, the way he kept leaning in to give him awkward shallow needy kisses. Danny was fifteen and no one else had ever touched him before, he couldn’t help himself against something like that, and it looked like Vlad couldn’t help himself either.

“Ahh, Daniel…” he sighed, hand slipping under the hem of Danny’s shirt to feel the bare skin of his back, both of their cocks growing slick with precum as he stroked, “I’m almost…”

Danny didn’t reply. He was too busy trying to pull Vlad’s shirt open one-handed so he could kiss his neck, thrusting into their hands, getting closer and closer himself until he let out a long, low cry, coming harder than he’d thought possible, right on Vlad’s suit. Danny was in a daze, leaning up against his chest in a warm fog of afterglow as the man switched his grip and continued to jerk himself off before a soft groan and something hot and wet against his stomach tipped Danny off that Vlad had come too.

They were leaned up against each other in Vlad’s chair, catching their breath, when there was a knock at the door.

“D-don’t come in!” Danny yelled, falling onto the floor trying to get his dick back in his pants.

“Go away!” Vlad yelled at the same time, furiously trying to wipe the cum off his suit. “I don’t want to be bothered! For the rest of the day! That’s an order, understood!?”

“...very well, Mr. President,” the secretary said, and there was the sound of footsteps leaving down the hall.

“...oh jeez, the door wasn’t even locked,” Danny said, scrambling over and locking it. Someone could have walked in on them at any time. Heck, they were lucky the secretary knocked!

Vlad was slumped over in his chair, dick still out, staring at the door with hollow eyes. “...there are going to be rumors, aren’t there.”

“Dude, there _are_ rumors,” Danny said, walking back over and sitting down on his lap as soon as Vlad had tucked himself back in. The man didn’t push him off, but he didn’t pull him close either. “Like, everyone in the world already thinks you’re banging me.”

“Well, I suppose they’re not unfounded anymore.”

“...do you regret it?” Danny said, looking up at him.

“...no,” Vlad said. “Maybe. Oh, give me time to think about it.”

“ _I_ don’t regret it.” He’d liked it. A lot. Even more than he’d been expecting, actually. And he wanted to do more.

“I’m happy for you.”

“Jeez, do you have to be like this?” Danny said. “You were pretty into it, so what’s the problem?”

Vlad shrugged helplessly.

“Well, whatever,” Danny said, standing up and grabbing his DS from the couch. “You want time to think? Go ahead. I’ll be in my room.” He had his hand on the doorknob when he realized his sweatervest was still very much covered in cum. “...you’d better hold onto this,” he said, pulling it off and throwing it onto the couch before leaving.

Back in his room, Danny flopped down on the bed and stared at the wall. That was all? A quick stop at third base and Vlad backs out cause he’s hung up on some stupid morals or something? He blackmailed the entire world into making him supreme ruler, what was banging a teen compared to that? Didn’t he wanna fuck Danny at all!? They hadn’t even gotten naked or anything! It was just rude already.

But Danny didn’t exactly wanna seduce Vlad, either. Not that he didn’t think he could do it, he literally just proved he could, he just...didn’t wanna be _too_ slutty. He did still feel kinda weird about wanting his former enemy’s dick so bad. He’d just embarrass himself. It was already kinda embarrassing that he’d spent this whole time waiting for Vlad to fuck him when the man himself apparently had no idea he even wanted to.

So sure. Let Vlad have his crisis of conscience about this. It might take a little while, but there was absolutely no way he wouldn’t come crawling back to Danny, not after that. Pretty hard to deny you’re hot for someone after you’ve already banged. So rather than make a big scene, Danny was going to sit back and wait for Vlad to come to him.

“I thought about it,” Vlad said as he threw the door open, pinning Danny down on the bed and kissing him hard.

...well that was faster than expected. Not that Danny minded; that handjob earlier had _not_ been enough. First things first, though… “Close the door, you horny idiot,” he said, shoving Vlad off him.

Vlad froze, then speed-walked to the door, closed it, bolted it, and speed-walked back. “N-now then, where were we?” he said, crouching over Danny again.

“You were about to lose your virginity to a fifteen-year-old boy,” Danny said, smirking up at him.

Vlad turned bright red. “I...you...did future me tell you that!?”

“It’s pretty obvious.”

“...yes, well, you’re about to lose yours to a man in his forties, _Daniel_ ,” he said, eyebrow twitching.

“Bring it on,” Danny said, grabbing him by the tie and dragging him down into a kiss. He fumbled with the buttons of Vlad’s suit for a moment before giving up and getting to work on his own clothes, breaking the kiss for a moment to shrug off his shirt. “Hurry up and get naked…” he said as Vlad kissed his neck. “It’s no fair if it’s just me.”

“Why, aren’t you eager,” Vlad said, sitting up to pull off his clothes, staring down at Danny’s bare torso with undisguised lust. Danny didn’t exactly mind the view either. He’d seen pictures of Vlad shirtless before (he might have looked them up), and there was the time he made the walls of his hotel room invisible after he’d showered (why did he do that again?), but there was a big difference between that and having it right in front of him.

“It used to piss me off _so much_ that you’re this hot,” Danny said, reaching up to pull the tie out of Vlad’s hair and run his fingers through it.

“And now?”

“Somehow, I’ve stopped minding.”

“For what it’s worth,” Vlad said, kissing down Danny’s chest, toying with his nipples until he moaned, “I’m rather infuriated by how attractive I find you as well.”

“Aw, nothing wrong with having good taste,” Danny said, wriggling out of his shorts and trying unsuccessfully to pull Vlad’s pants off.

“If I had good taste, I wouldn’t be here, now would I?” Vlad said, stripping down the rest of the way and grinding his bare erection up against Danny’s, breath catching. “Now then, as you’re the one who’s apparently been fantasizing about this for the last month…” he said, voice husky and sensual, tracing a hand down Danny’s hip, “what do you want me to do to you, little badger?”

...that was a good question, actually. He _had_ been fantasizing about this for the last month, about Vlad doing all sorts of unbelievably dirty things like using his duplicates to spitroast him or filming them fucking or making Danny call him “daddy” or whatever, and as a fantasy? As much as he hated to admit it, yeah, it was actually really hot. In reality, though… The whole blowjob thing had been a pretty stark wake-up call that just cause he jerked off to something didn’t mean he could handle it in reality. And Vlad had no idea what he was doing anyways, so he’d probably just embarrass them both if he tried to do anything like that.

That said, there were still a few things that seemed doable.

“I want you to hurry up and _fuck_ me already,” Danny said, flipping them over so that he was straddling Vlad, rubbing his ass up against the man’s cock. “And since I know you’re not experienced,” he continued, leaning over awkwardly to open the drawer of the bedside table with his fingertips and pull out a half-empty bottle of lube, “I’ll do you a favor and take the lead.”

Vlad blinked, looking from Danny to the lube and back. “...why, haven’t you been busy.”

“S-shut up, I just thought I’d better get myself used to it before you went to town on me, alright?”

“You know, I’m honestly rather offended you made all these assumptions about me being some kind of child predator.”

“No one’s _making_ you do this!” Danny said with a groan. “ _You’re_ the one who came back for more, so clearly you do wanna fuck at least one teen.”

“Only because you offered!”

“Yeah, I bet that’s what they all say.”

Vlad pulled Danny down with a hand behind his neck. “Are you going to sit there being snippy all day, Daniel, or are you going to ride me?” he said, running his other hand up Danny’s thigh.

“...I can do both,” Danny said, kissing him hard before sitting back up, squirting some lube on his hand, and slipping a finger inside himself with a soft moan. The look on Vlad’s face alone made all that practice worthwhile; Danny had barely done anything yet and he was already practically drooling. “God, you're so easy…”

“Look who's talking,” Vlad murmured, eyes still fixed on Danny as the boy fingered himself. He could feel Vlad's cock twitching up against his thigh. He wanted it inside him so bad he could barely think straight.

Danny pushed a third finger inside himself, moaning performatively as he gave himself a few more hard stretches, handing the lube to Vlad. “C’mon, slick yourself down.”

Vlad did as he was told (for once), breath catching as he covered his cock in a thick coat of lube. “...you’re sure you want to do this?” he asked as Danny wiped his fingers on the sheet and took hold of him, positioning himself to put it in.

“Listen, just cause I couldn’t suck you off, it doesn’t mean I’m not DTF!” Danny said, almost pouting. "What, do _you_ not wanna all of a sudden?"

"I want this," Vlad said, eyes locked on his, hair falling loose around his face. "I want _you,_  my Daniel."

Danny couldn't have waited a second longer if his life depended on it. He kissed Vlad hard as he lowered himself onto his cock, moans and whimpers muffled in his mouth. Fingering was _nothing_ compared to this, hot fullness threatening to overwhelm his senses completely as he rocked his hips back and forth, working himself down until Vlad was in him to the hilt. And yeah, it hurt too, especially when he braced his hands on Vlad’s stomach and began to ride him in earnest, but Danny Phantom had been in more than his fair share of fights. He could take a little pain. He was starting to think he might even enjoy it; at least when it was coupled with this much pleasure.

Vlad let out a breathy gasp of “Daniel…” as he wrapped his hands around the boy’s hips, beginning to thrust almost in rhythm with Danny. "You're so tight, you're so good…"

"You're not bad yourself…" Danny panted, letting out a long moan as he leaned back and Vlad hit his sweet spot dead on. He couldn't think straight. He'd never felt so good in his life and all he knew was that he wanted _more_. “Don’t...don’t hold back…” he panted, flipping them over so Vlad was on top of him, wrapping his legs around the man’s hips and grinding up against his stomach, knotting his fingers in his hair and pulling him down into a messy, open-mouthed kiss. “Go ahead and...really mess me up…”

Vlad didn’t hesitate, pulling almost all the way out and driving back in hard, again and again, until Danny was clinging to the sheets for dear life, back arching with ecstacy, each thrust pushing him closer and closer to the edge until he couldn’t stand it anymore. He’d barely wrapped his hand around himself and begun to stroke when he came with a cry of "Vlad…!" tensing against the man as he was fucked through it before Vlad gave a long ragged moan and Danny could feel something hot filling him before the man slumped down, heavy atop him.

Vlad was the one to come to his senses first, murmuring an apology as he pulled out gently and shifted to lie next to Danny, wrapping an arm around him and stroking his hair.

“ _Dang_ that was good…" Danny said, cuddling up against him. "We should’ve done that ages ago.”

"...did you really want me all this time?" Vlad asked.

"What? No, I mean… 'Want' is kinda… Like, I thought _you_ were into _me_ and you were gonna try something sooner or later so… S-shut up," Danny said, cutting himself off when he saw Vlad's fond, bemused smile. "...did you really _not_ wanna do me?"

"Not that I was aware of, but..." Vlad said, pulling Danny closer, running a hand gently up and down his sweat-damp back. "Now that I think about it, perhaps I wanted you from the very start. I can't pretend I don't still have reservations about this, though; you might have spent the last month bracing yourself for this, in more ways than one, but I didn't even realize I was attracted to you until a few hours ago."

“Yeah, I guess that’s fair,” Danny said, shrugging. He was still having a hard time wrapping his head around the fact that Vlad had just...not realized, apparently. Though it did explain a lot; that whole “be my son” thing had always reeked of repressed thirst. “Still don’t get why _this_ is what bothers you, when you were A-okay with blackmailing the whole world.”

“...it just doesn’t sit right with me, that’s all. _Especially_ if there are rumors about it. I don’t mind my victory being resented, but being thought of as a...as the kind of man who…”

“As a pedophile?”

Vlad groaned, burying his face in the pillow. “It’s not _pedophilia,_  I’m not the least bit interested in anyone underage except you. But yes.”

“Well then, I guess you’ve just gotta be such a good guy that no one cares who you’re banging, huh?” Danny said, lounging beside him.

“Still on about humanitarianism?”

“I think I’ve earned it, don’t you?”

“You were the one who talked about earning it, not I,” Vlad said, propping himself up on an arm to give Danny a gentle kiss. “But yes, I suppose you have.”

 

“...social services, support for developing nations, medical research, and more. President Masters has stated ‘My intentions were only ever to unite humanity as one and create a better world for future generations.’ When asked how the 250 statues of himself fit with these intentions, he declined to comment. These proposals will be implemented as soon as is logistically possible, and we are optimistic that…”

 

“...between Israel and Palestine has officially come to an end, thanks to the intervention of Masters. Reparations discussions are proceeding smoothly, and it seems likely…”

 

“...for cancer has finally been discovered, and will be freely available under Mastercare as soon as research trials have been completed. Those interested in participating in these trials should…”

 

“...tax rates for the 1% as a way of redistributing wealth. President Masters has stated that he will be exempt from these taxes, as he is from all others. However, he has promised that the billions of dollars that the government will receive will be used to counteract the effects of Global Warming and invested in alternative energy sources, which would…”

 

“...for a Nobel Peace Prize. President Masters has assured the public that he is not involved in the Nobel Prize Committee in any capacity, and is surprised as anyone. Looking back on his actions over the past year, it’s easy to see why he deserves it; despite his ostensible status as dictator, he has perhaps done more to benefit the Earth and its citizens than any past recipient. We have no doubt that…”

 

“What did I tell you?” Danny said, head resting on Vlad’s chest as they lounged together in bed, eyes on the TV. “Being a good guy’s not so bad after all, is it?”

“You know, it’s really not,” Vlad said, toying with Danny’s hair. “I never thought I’d enjoy being a hero, but the public acclaim is really quite to my liking. My approval rating was never this high when I was mayor.”

“And you didn’t even have to overshadow anyone this time!” There was an awkward pause. Vlad couldn’t quite meet Danny’s eyes. “Oh come on, seriously!?”

“Only a few times, and it was for a good cause!”

“Jeez, you really never change, huh?” Danny said, shaking his head.

“I think I’ve changed more than enough, thank you very much.”

“Yeah, you’re not wrong,” Danny said, pulling him down into a kiss, smirking up at him. “You’re welcome.”

Vlad just hmphed and kissed him back.


	2. Vladdy Kink Afterword: You and Me Could Make a Vlad Romance

Sometime around April of last year, Hound suggested we watch Danny Phantom, since she liked it as a kid. I had basically zero familiarity with the series, but I’d always been vaguely interested, and she said there was one character she thought I’d just _love_. It was Vlad. She was very, very right. I spent the next few months developing an extremely intense love-hate relationship with Danny Phantom (the show and the character), and then the next year or so hyperfocusing on the show. I commissioned a body pillow. It is the best purchase I have ever made.

The idea for Vladdy Kink started mostly as a joke. Entertaining Vlad was intended as a standalone, but way more people read it than I ever expected, and I had ideas for other episodes, so… Unfortunately, my fixation kinda started to run its course when I was on the last few stories, and I think it shows, but I wanted to finish this; both for myself, and for everyone who’s been reading and commenting all this time.

I’d like to thank the_ghostwriter96 and Schediaphilia, whose Danny Fanfic was a huge inspiration to me; YagoLafine, who gave their impressions of nearly every fic, and whose comments I always looked forward to; AwkwardWok and JJCross, who suggested ideas for Million Dollar Ghost and Masters of All Time respectively; and of course my dear Hound. Even after art school burnout got the better of her, she was still invaluable as a proofreader, someone to bounce opinions off of, and my biggest fan; it’s no exaggeration to say I would never have been able to finish this without her support.

And last but most certainly not least, everyone who ever commented, gave kudos, or even just read. I appreciate it more than I can say. I know I haven’t been the best about replying to comments in the past, but I can promise I’ll reply to every comment on this, so if you have anything you’d like to ask or say, I’d love to hear it!

Now, after over 75k words of smut, allow me some self-indulgence of a different variety: my thoughts on every Vladdy Kink fic, in order of publishing. I think explaining intent is insulting to both the writer and the readers, so I’ve tried to limit myself to trivia.

  * _Entertaining Vlad_ : I love shifts in tense/person to indicate an altered POV; I was actually hoping to do more of it in other fics, but the opportunity never presented itself. The ending was originally much weaker (Danny was 100% on board with Vlad) and the way it is now is entirely thanks to Hound’s suggestions. “You'll learn to love me soon enough,” was all hers.
  * _Suck on This_ : boy howdy is this dumb. Definitely one that started with “wouldn't it be funny if…” and my desire to see Vlad suck dick, and never went much further than that. Vlad’s POV is completely wasted. I still think Sam and Tucker walking in on them is funny. The title started as a placeholder, but I couldn't come up with anything better.
  * _In Your Dreams_ : this might still be one of my favorites, honestly. I had the large illustration hanging above my bed for the longest time. Vlad acts very suave in this (you know, by Vlad standards) but he's definitely freaking the fuck out on the inside the entire time.
  * _Vlad Science_ : I don't think I was planning on having the clone melt when I started writing this, but here we are! The scenario for if he hadn't melted is House of the Dead, it's clearly an idea I'm fascinated with. There's so much wasted potential in this show. The title was going to be “Come To Vladdy” until Hound pointed out that the daddykink is mostly incidental, and suggested the current title instead.
  * _Bargaining Positions_ : this one was mostly Hound’s idea. The more I think about it, I have no idea what's going through Vlad’s head in this one; “force Danny to make a sex tape” is pretty outlandish even for him. I worry that the second half is retreading the same territory as the first. Hot, though.
  * _Self-Love_ : you have no idea what I went through to track down this comic, entirely on the grounds that body-swapping has an unbelievable amount of horny potential and I needed to see it for myself. “Infernal bony body” indeed. This is essentially just horny garbage, but like… _good_ horny garbage.
  * _Foes With Benefits_ : I said it in the tags and I'll say it again here -- Jazz would be incredible at hunting ghosts. I love the idea of Danny being a masochist and just completely not realizing. It took me _ages_ for this title to hit me, even though it's so obvious?
  * _Gravitational Two-Body Problem_ : I finished the first draft of this months before it went up, and it went through some _very_ heavy revisions in the interim. Namely, the climax was completely different and involved them going to space. It felt too easy, though; it's the exact sort of thing Danny expresses frustration with in the final draft, Vlad doing some big show of wealth as a way of expressing affection. I'm still not totally happy with the way things resolve. I've spent too long looking at this one. Danny is fifteen in this and chronologically subsequent fics pretty much entirely because "fifteen to twenty-five" has a better feel than "fourteen to twenty-four." It's been bugging me, but I can't change it now without messing up the timeline. RIP
  * _Sum of Two Halves_ : this is where I read some Danny Fanfic by other folks and started thinking more about what was going through Vlad's head. I am pleased with the results. If anyone went into the second half expecting sex (or anything other than Danny and Vlad both being very upset)...it would be a lie to say I'm sorry.
  * _Sugar Vladdy_ : I wrote this one ages ago and waited on publishing it cause I honestly don't like it very much. Danny coming on to Vlad feels off. The reason Vlad calls him “little prince”...is cause Hound called me that once and I got incredibly flustered. ////// I had a really hard time writing the second half for some reason; there was a whole other draft that got decently far that involved crossdressing. The “petit mort” joke is my favorite part, it's brilliant and I will accept no disagreement.
  * _Scapeghost_ : this feels like maybe the most “in-character” Vlad -- along with Sum of Two Halves, though in very different ways. It _definitely_ has the most skewed, unreliable POV of any Vladdy Kink, which was both interesting and kind of unsettling to write. Between fic and RP, I feel like I spend a lot of time getting into the heads of delusional abusers, and I really don't know how to feel about that. I didn't realize until recently, but cut the sex and this serves as a good prologue to House of the Dead.
  * _Phantom Pain_ : my original idea for this one was something with Danny getting amputated and being forced to watch his clone take his place (basically, House of the Dead), but I didn't know how to fit sex into that. This idea hit me very suddenly; I think I wrote most of it in one sitting, while dissociating. I'm pleased with it, but it's easily in the top three most fucked up things I've written.
  * _Ghosts of the Past_ : I know there's a reason Vlad’s out of character, but it was still weird to write. The main reason Danny tops is cause I hadn't written much of that and wanted some more variety. And this Vlad _is_ kind of a bottom. In retrospect I kinda wish I'd written the first part in Vlad’s POV and the second in Danny's, I think I could have done something really interesting with that. This has the best kudos/reads ratio by a respectable margin, which is odd for me because I honestly don't think it's one of the better ones. I suspect it is because it's fluffy.
  * _Not As Vlad As It Sounds_ : this one draws pretty heavily from A) the fics Creep and Concussion by the_ghostwriter96, and B) personal experience. It was uncomfortable to write, and I'm still not sure how I feel about the results. It really needs more buildup, but it's long enough as it is. The discussion around the title was something like -- Me: is this not the worst title you can even imagine? Hound: oh absolutely. Me: so I should use it then? Hound: what kind of a question is that, of course you should.
  * _Bang for Your Buck_ : listen, in a project like this where you've gotta work within certain guidelines, sometimes you're gonna wind up with something that just plain isn't very good. And then you have to leave it up and sweat every time you remember it exists. I really had no idea where this was gonna go before I started writing; I was originally intending to have vignettes with the “customers,” but it was long enough already, and I didn't have any good ideas anyways. Poor Danny.
  * _Planet Plasmius_ : I really, _really_ hate Phantom Planet; there's no better example of how Butch seems to have it in for Vlad. I had actually written a fair bit of this before being hit by a pretty intense bout of sex-repulsion and finding it very difficult to write that sort of fun horny trash, especially if it was going to be on the long side (like Gravitational Two-Body Problem). I was seriously considering scrapping the whole idea and going with something else; I wrote bits and pieces of a fic picking up after Sum of Two Halves and following them through the series, focusing on the idea that them getting together was somehow inevitable (which meant I got to use lots of tasty gravity metaphors), and then something vaguely _Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead_ with Vlad and Danny realizing they’ve got weird jumbled memories of different ways things could have gone (e.g. the other fic in the series) and that they’re fictional characters being shoved together like dolls. The former fell through because I couldn’t get the structure the way I wanted it to be; the latter, because I had no idea where to go with it. I like the concept but this isn’t the fandom for it. So I just went back to the original draft, muscled through the rest of the sex scene, and gave up on it being any longer than usual, because it was either that or never finishing Vladdy Kink at all, and I very much wanted to finish it already.



Thanks again for reading, everyone.

Hare, aka Tittysatan, aka Sinclair


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